Dear
Friends,
My Aunt
Teresa died at the age of 85 on September 13. She had not been a churchgoer
since her teens. One day, several months before she died, I cautiously asked
her what sorts of funeral instructions she would like to leave for her children
to follow? Teresa was puzzled. What did I mean? Do you want to have a service
at all? Something at the funeral home? At a local Protestant church in town?
No! Teresa’s voice suddenly got stronger. I’m Catholic. I’ve always been
Catholic. I want to be buried from the church where I was baptized. And so it
was.
I was
stunned at Teresa’s sense of herself, but in retrospect, I shouldn’t have been.
Catholic roots run deep and a lack of weekly practice does not always imply
that a person has abandoned her faith. It has taken another path.
While
Christianity is still the largest religion in our country, individuals are
moving from place to place along the spectrum. Others are simply getting off,
that is to say, choosing to be unaffiliated with any faith tradition.
Some leave
their church because they disagree with the teachings of their faith on certain
points. Some have been alienated by a priest or a member of the pastoral staff.
Others no longer feel welcome because of the life choices they have made. Some
may come back. Many others might not.
But what goes
on in the hearts of those who apparently don’t return? Do their hearts ever burn with love for God?
Does Jesus still mean anything to them? Where do they find meaning in life?
These are
not questions easily resolved over a cup of coffee at a busy Starbucks. Both questions
and the leaving are typically not quick for believers. I believe that, if the
church has meant anything to them at all, the hurt must be personally deep for
people to go, and the departures hurtful for family members and friends. The
pews are more and more empty in Mainline Protestant Churches and in the Roman
Catholic Church. But are the people who “left” really gone?
In fact,
some are, notably Millennials (people born between 1982 and 1999) who have a
wide range of faith choices to consider. Some were never baptized, their
parents wanting them to make up their minds when they got older. The ones who
were baptized haven’t always been encouraged to love the church, its rituals and
seasons. Jesus is not well known to them. What would entice them to come back?
Yet
Millennials admit to a “God Hunger.” They also strongly desire to experience
community connections. They desperately want the world to be a better place,
yet the options of ways and means are too many and too frustrating. Millennials
sample practices from many faiths. Finding a spiritual home is a work in
progress for them.
There are
ways that God calls to people – older and younger—to draw close. Some of us
only recognize traditional ways: prayer, sacraments, Mass, the authorized moral
life. But God can act wherever and however the person needs to have the pain
assuaged, the realizations about life become more clear, love more abundant in
their life. God offers a sense of wonder at the cosmos, and human solidarity to
lead us pilgrims along the way. These are not lost on Millennials and others
called “Nones.”
As for the
Church, to borrow from Pope Francis: Believers should wear church membership as
a loose-fitting garment, not a straightjacket.
~ Sister
Joan Sobala
